i moved to sweden

...so yeah! didnt really move yet, just came here to check out the life, hopefully find a way to stay. been here for a week, traveling around gothenburg, still haw to work up the strength to go out and meet people; speaking of which, is there anyone in gothenburg here? and then a wild change of subject appears! ill be going to dreamhack! is anyone else going? if you are look for a guy in blue jeans, you cant miss me xD

its been a while

ok, i got no excuse, just didnt feel like blogging.been doing some drawing, hope ill get to a scanner so i can sho them to you ^^

the haze is back

thers nothing to be done, sitting around the house smoking, drawing some, not really feeling motivated to do anything. might as well play some video games, something 16 bit usually helps. ill let you know how that works out, in the mean time touch this i know you want to :)

what now

all the test are done, failed 2 won 1, the rest of the summer im suppose to find a job and and... dont know what else. was thinking of starting making a game about some thing, got a couple of ideas, ill start with the simplest one, just a walk down a flight of stairs. i think in the high end engines of today i should be able to produce a result relatively quickly and it should look and play good. should i consult some friends who study architecture? or just brute force it? any opinions?

p.s. my hare turned out just fine, i think ill keep it for a while longer

facebook fan page

i made a facebook fan page to promote this shit, thers a link in the link dump page, and in case you cant follow that link hers the direct link http://www.facebook.com/pages/Young-Dued/228481423840101 please like so that i may steal your friends and promote this page manually :P

oh, look

almost no one came to visit. so this becomes a place where i write about shit once again, not that that changes anything, just that now  thers no one reading, anyway its my birth day today, so its only fitting that no one showed up. also ill make a facebook page to "promote" this blog. if you feel like it join and share. the link will be in the link dump, and ill make a post about it

hello there

not much happening lately, started doing nails, bought a bunch of nail polishes and materials, forgot to by white, idiot, didnt seem so obvious that it is really useful, beginner. apart from that, thers this sweet little number that flew in from the states. melancholy eyes, hare as long as her legs, and legs for miles. dark and aromatic, sure does have a purty lill mouth to go with all that charisma and character. unfortunately im banned from entering by here sister, who just so happens to be one of those people i dont got the heart to cross. still, its fun spending time with such a treat of a person. just hope she doesnt linger in my mind for to long :)


for a couple of days now iv been sun gazing, and i dont know if its the meditation or the medicine, but im starting to feel better. im giving more credit to meditating, namely there was a time in my life when i had a lot of time on my hands and no better idea what to do than meditate and play dota. it is in that period that i learned the most about the the game, and more surprisingly about life, thers a subtle line connecting all things in life. but you already know that, its the realization of the thought and catching of the line thahs enlightening. im not saying im there, im just saying i can see it from here.

p.s. im getting my hare died black :3 ill let you know how that works out


so... just got back from a 4 hour clinic-spree. got some pills to take, three different colorful bottles. starting the medication tonight, from what iv been able to read, it does the same thing as weed, dont get why i had to stop taking that to start taking this, it does mostly the same thing? anyway ill let you know how it goes.

power overFUCKINGwhelming!

i hate myself, almost an hero couple of days ago, now i feel better the Jesus! you guys helped a lot! hers a bit of my power to you all! AND NOW I MUST GO AND FUCK SOME BITCHES!!!11!! bipolar idiot -.- should haw know it gonna end soon, cuz im AWSOME!


i dont mean to whine

i think im depressed. from what iv been reading it goes away after two weeks, its been a weak now, i hope it does. i must study and i cant, cant sleep, can barely eat, cant get stuff done, but that nothing new i usually cant. anyway u just wanted you guys to know your comment really help, doesnt matter if there supportive or judgemental, its just that they are there. its nice to know that at least something i do matters to someone... probably everything i do matters to most of my friends, its just that im to blind to see that it does. insecure whiny bastard :')

voices in my head

a couple of new followers and i feel like thers a better tomorrow, tomorrow! that sounded better in my head. anyway thank you all for stopping by, it means the world to me! i got some studying to do for the next twenty or so days, wont be here much, but ill try and put in the effort to write something, at least a rant on the current state of the world... or something even more generic :)


tried killing myself yesterday, failed.

not much

havent made a post in a while, there was stuff to do irl. just wanted to report in, let all you caring people know im not dead. i got sent to some neuropsychiatry clinic, what a treat... a small flight of stairs followed by a glass wall led to a hallway bending to the right. the stench of sweat crept i as made my way to the 5 locked doors at the end of the clinic, no door knobs, no keyholes. a flickering neon light kindly pointed the way back. i started knocking on random dors, one of them opened just as a junky walked in to the clinic. as his face ticked he asked for some medicine from the lady that opened the door. i cant tell you what emotion was displayed on her face, i dont think it was pleasant, here eye twitched as she replied: 'the doctor isnt in!'. some more words were tortured between them, he left, she turned to me, i passed her the paper. after a most unpleasant interaction i gathered enough information, and left. the sunlight newer felt to welcoming.


not sure if thats the way to translate it, but anyway, a friend proposed a solution to my mindless wondering through life with: starting a dramaturgy this fall. not sure if i should join, i think i got the bare minimum of what it takes, bullshitting skills a being barely literate. 

is there anyone of you who got some experience with this? what do you think, should i join? 

i have a dream!

so... yeah! i was thinking of pulling a joke on some people, it goes a little something like this:
walk into work/class, wait for that moment when you and that one person you might consider calling a friend are chatting alone in the corner. direct the conversation to the point where you start talking about your dreams. start of slow, but work it up to a grotesque sex scene. do your best to make him/here remember it. set up is done. now wait for a situation, preferably immediately after, where you, your friend and a coworker of the opposite gender, or same if your openly gay or relay like to spice the joke up, are engaged in conversation. punchline: make a clear statement of how you had a dream about the third party member and how you just told your friend how it went. the look on your friends face should be priceless, if not, ask him what can he recollect of the story.

i tried it, but was cut short by a lack of class brakes :(

tell me what you think, and if you got what it takes, do it and tell me about your experience.

and have fun!

Agnus Dei

SORAKA BUILD GUIDE: Agnus Dei by zhigatron - SoloMid.NET - League of Legends Competitive Gaming Community

so, surprisingly enough i managed to finish this. its a guide for a league of legend champion. i play a lot of this game, not really in to it, but its a good time killer till dot2 gets here xD if you got the time, and you know what is what in the world of lol go check it out, and if not google league of legends if you are interested, else let the shit storm begin! :D

i've been thinking...

didnt really end up with anything useful in/after the process, but still might as well blog about it... oh, yeah, i got a psychiatrist appointment coming up soon, hope they can fix me, or at least tell me im fucked for life so i can finally quit and stop trying to help myself. also been gettin in to the blog culture, not sure if like. still dont see the point of it all, but its nice to shout out to the world and know no one will hear you, so... HELLO INTERNET!

might as well

yes, this entry is just for you, thanks for joining me ill do the same ass soon as i figure out how to actually follow people here :/ if its not to much of a fuss leave a comment explaining how to do that? thanks :*

some other time

just in case anyone comes back, thank you for visiting, and iv been thinking about hell and all the propaganda tonight, but its to late to do that now :/ i hope i dont forget and do it tomorrow... anyway thanks. . . i haw no idea what im doing. . .

a simple joke

3favourite-boobie-type-facebook-tagging-meme-picture.jpg (815×536)

was thinking of posting this on fb and tagging as many girls as i can in it, but then i realized someone can get offended, so i didnt... but still i felt like sharing that...


spending most of the time thinking abut writing a new entry, but not really doing it.

it is a good day to die

i think im coming down with a cold, fml. and just as the semester is about to start. as a kid i use to be so happy when i would get sick, cuz i got to skip school, now days i hate it... i still get to skip a few days, but then i get to skip a day whenever i feel like it, so this is not as much fun as it use to be. yup, got nothing better to blog about...ill run into something more fun eventually xD

a time as good as any

Archie McPhee & Co. - Toys, Gifts & Novelties

so i bumped into this, got pushed, but gently. . . for a time i didnt know what was going on, then my brain tried to make sense of some of the things that were going on, then i ran and came back to enjoy it for what it is. . . ill go take a shower now


so... another pointless post. i hope by making them, sooner or later, ill start working up an addiction to this, and be able to write all my thoughts for you all to see and comment on... dont really know what its good for, i just hope that this somehow leads to a fuller and happier life xD